Return to school worries…

The end of the school holidays and return to school is something we can all remember from childhood. After what feels like an endless summer for children and parents the start of a new school year looms large, bringing with it early mornings and return to old routines, school drop offs, homework and extra curricular activities. New terms, new beginnings can be stressful for everyone but for your child this transition can be difficult and an anxious time if they are worrying about leaving you, meeting new teachers or making new friends. So as they are set to go, their new school uniform (stressful in itself) with bags and pencil cases at the ready, whether they are starting school or changing year, how can you help? Try PREPARE

Prepare- Firstly in the days or last week before the start of school, try to gradually reinstate school time routines with more realistic bedtimes and wind downs ( I know not easy, wondering have they actually become feral ). Enlist their help getting them organised with everything they need for their return and keep them involved in preparation, Who doesn’t remember the excitement of new stationary and arranging new pencil case or chat about what they want for school lunches. This helps as they may feel they have very little control and the better prepared they are the better they will feel.

Reassure- They are not alone; we all feel the same when starting something new, assure them their friends and maybe even their teacher will be having similar feelings. Draw on instances of how you felt when you started something new, reframe butterflies as sparks of excitement. Go for a walk and gently talk or chat in the car about any of their concerns and more importantly validate those feelings. Above all listen and reassure you are there for them.

Engage more- Try to be more present for the first couple weeks and if you can pick them up or drop them off at least for the first morning. Try to get home early or make their favourite dinner (chicken casserole always worked for me). Encourage them to think of something special you can do together at the weekend and look forward to. Give them more attention until they settle into their new routine and actively listen to their stories.

Positive reinforcement- Remind them of what they like about school and what they have missed during the holidays, If your child is just starting talk about the fun things they will be doing and the opportunities they will have to participate in new activities. Include small positive actions, reward charts and try to make it a positive experience.

Arrange - Playdates with school friends, this can really help.. If you feel like your child is anxious about getting the bus or drop off at school, have a practice run, this works for teens too. If your child is worried about something in particular try role-play, a great way to practice for any new situations we are worrying about. If they are still worried speak to the school and they may even be able to facilitate a smooth handover or a practice run through at school.

Promote - Healthier routines and lifestyle, Make sure they are getting enough sleep, check their diet, watch out for too much sugar or caffeine. Ensure they get some downtime, whether that’s reading, tv or gaming, those early starts are a shock to the system and they will be tired.

ABOVE ALL

Enjoy the last few days of the holidays if you can and look forward to getting back into a routine too! If you are feeling stressed or anxious about their return or first day… breath deeply, try to be relaxed. Remember changes are emotional and anxiety provoking for everyone involved but just like us most children do settle in quite quickly.

However if you feel you child is still worrying or feeling anxious speak to the school. Understanding the signs your child may be suffering with their mental health isn’t easy and can depend on their developmental age but keep a look out for:

• Loss of appetite

• Complaining of tummy troubles (aches, nausea, butterflies)

• Appearing more clingy than normal

• Attention seeking behaviour

• Regressive developmental behaviours (thumb sucking or bedwetting)

• Changes in eating or sleeping patterns (disturbed sleep or nightmares)

• Restless and fidgety

• Easily upset or angered

• Unexplained crying

• Struggling to get on with other members of the family

  If your child is still struggling after 2 weeks or their symptoms are worsening contact a medical health professional

  It is important to remember that anxiety can be very effectively treated in children.